Problem I Have With: Road Redemption

I don’t think Road Redemption, a crowd-funded tribute to the good ol’ Road Rash, is inherently a bad game. But, yeah, there’s a ‘but’ to that.

I picked up the left and right lauded ‘road-like’ last week in need for some carnage in my life. Because it was recommended by people I respect and because Burnout Paradise Remastered requires EA’s Origin. Which is roughly equivalent to shitting all over my keyboard and closing the laptop lid with a strangely satisfying Nutella sandwich slap.

It wasn’t long before the Nutella routine became a viable alternative to Road Redemption‘s rooftop levels.

Almost forgot. There’s fog, too.

Few things in games I call ‘absolutely fucking infuriating’ and mean it from the bottom of my heart. Their sheer, barely justifiable existence (‘because I have to jump over skyscrapers to transit between lands’ is a little far-fetched, it’s not just me, is it?) pisses me off to no end. That’s before I start to dig into what they mean to gameplay.

Road Redemption is a fighting game on bikes. But nooo, surely, managing fisticuffs, battery, decapitations, or submachine gun ride-bys while keeping an eye on drugs-fueled traffic and the road itself, can’t be all that’s there to enjoy! In the true spirit of the-more-the-awesomer, we’re going to put you doing all that on top of a bunch of high-rise buildings. And we’re going to strap fucking jump jets on your bike. Well, no. Just no.

See, there’s ridiculous and then there’s ridiculous. Road Redemption‘s rooftops is by far the stupidest, self-serving ‘git-gud’ idea to put into a game like this, a rogue-lite no less, I’ve come across in recent years. It’s not fun. Stop it.

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